Observations From an Upstate NY Commute

1) Even if a Porsche Cayenne *looks* like a Santa Fe from its bulbous rear, it can still smoke your ass from a stop-light. Beware.

2) Nissan should choose some other form of innovation and lose the phosphorescent slugs that grace the front of the Juke. I can't even imagine how that particular feature made it into production. What do they do? Glow eerily in spelunking expeditions?

3) A Dodge Neon is never, ever the right answer to the question "What should I spend my hard-earned money on?" Also, say no to the Caliber. In fact, maybe there's a Dodge theme here.

4) Even with a king-cab and a car seat, a Ford F-350 is not a family vehicle.

5) 37 miles one-way in a 2003 Toyota Sienna Minivan kinda sucks, unless you actually have the kids in the car. Then you understand why there is so much separation between you and them.

6) 37 miles one-way in a 2006 BMW 325xi almost never sucks, unless you actually have the kids in the car. Then you wistfully recall the interior separation of the minivan.

7) When did the Ford Taurus become attractive? Dear God, am I that old?

8) Just pull the home-built dirt-track racer back into the barn for the winter. I can't even see the "For Sale" sign underneath all the snow. And the very idea seems too damn cold.

9) An informal survey of Honda Civics of a certain age: body kit, body kit, grad student, rust. Also found in various combinations (body kit/rust or rust/grad student), but rarely body kit/grad student.

10) Tire pressure lights never turn on in good weather, unless the only available pull-off is verdant with poison ivy. Otherwise, be prepared to peer at each tire suspiciously through the slush, and then check all four anyway.